When Do You Need to Learn Bridge? Planning for the Fourth Quarter

When my friend, Elaine, was soon going to turn 90, she gave me all her books on bridge as a gift. I was in my early 50’s at the time. When I told her that I almost never play cards, she talked at length about the importance of planning now for later.

Elaine's 91st Birthday

Elaine has broken barriers and led a fascinating life, from running a modeling school to helping in the development of the original IBM office computers. She is sharp and passionate and on top of world events. She performed as a tap dancer until relatively recently. And she has made countless friends playing bridge.

While all of her volunteer and leisure activities have kept her moving and interested later in life, she  needed to give many of them up as her body changed. Bridge faithfully carried her through the later years and gave her a way to socialize, keep dates on the calendar, and keep her mentally sharp.

I still have not taken up bridge, but Elaine's urging got me thinking about how I want to plan and live my third chapter. It's fabulous how our generation pursues passions for broad, active pursuits like skiing, walking the El Camino de Santiago in Spain or a beach in the tropics, playing soccer, going to the gym, or golfing on all the great courses. What comes after that?

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Variety and Balance
We are invited to be intentional in our planning to incorporate the versatility and variety in our lives that will help us adapt to a change in health, should we need it. It doesn't have to be done out of a hand-wringing, pessimistic 'what if?' place. And it certainly is not an invitation to be less active simply because of our age! We all hope that we won't need to radically slow down as life goes on, but the fact is that will be true for over half of us. What would be a satisfying fallback for you?

Our bodies and minds love balance. As we are planning ahead, our natures lead us to living out of our natural preferences. We will tend toward either mostly active or quiet pursuits, extroverted or introverted activities, working with our hands and bodies or working with our minds. Committing to a  balance of activities that let us explore the opposite of our inclinations is actually helpful for the brain. Additionally, we will more often find a deeper growth edge doing things we don't normally do.

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Questions for Reflection:

• How will you fill your days and your brain and your heart if you can no longer travel or move easily? If your eyesight failed gradually? If you have a spouse or partner who is homebound? How can you cultivate those interests now?
  
• What activities do you have planned that get you doing something completely out of your comfort zone?
  
• What do you have planned that you will know and love to do if you physically can’t do as much?
• Where might you need a new activity to balance out what you have naturally focused in on?
• If you lost physical abilities, what would you still be able to do that would get you together with other people (even if you are an introvert)?
• How can you begin to more intentionally cultivate all of these pieces in your life now?
  

Ruth Tongen helps you take stock, plan and live retirement (or your next chapter) in a bigger, happier, healthier way. She can help you find an 'aha' and move that to an aspiration and then on to an action. Move past sticking points and begin living on purpose.

E-mail: ruth@ruthtongen.com with questions or to explore how Ruth can help you live a great next chapter.