Shaping Retirement: Passion and Curiosity

Every day of your life is valuable and deserving of the things you are drawn to or feel gifted to bring to your community. How will you shape this stage of life?

Paths to Reinventing Retirement
The people I see who want to plan or reinvent their retirement come from at least one of these five main paths. Which of these do you relate to?

• Some people have always been planners and they want to get their retirement objectives planned out in the same way.
• For some, work has been so central to their time and identity and social life, that retirement creates an upheaval.
• For others, retirement began differently than planned, through the sudden end of a job, a health change, or other unforeseen events.
• Yet others had a retirement that was going along just fine and suddenly took a sharp left as their circumstances changed or because they woke up one day suddenly overcome with the desire to do something deeper or different.
• And finally, some folks simply want help to improve their health or live in a healthier manner.

Discerning What's Next
People in each of the groups above have goals that need to be addressed in a unique way. But there is one focus common to all: the desire to discern what they want life to look like going forward. Most want meaning and purpose. Their means to how that unfolds takes shape in one of three ways:

1. Some people have one or a list of passions they care deeply about and want to do in their third chapter. Their work at hand is to prioritize their time, what they want and develop guideposts to assure they are choosing in alignment with their passions and priorities. There is an intensity to how they plan and live. They harness their passion and let it make every day count.
2. Others feel like they should have a passion but haven't had time to name or cultivate it yet because they were busy working. It either wasn't central to their work, or the passions they had in their work life won't or didn't transfer to retirement. Exploring, identifying and then narrowing in on building around their passions is their focus. They want to move forward with impact and effectiveness with a central focus--once they are clear on what that is.
   
3. There is another group with a different tack. I have a friend who described it well. He is beginning to ponder retirement. He has decided that for him it isn't about finding that thing he is passionate about and pursuing it (though I would argue he is pursuing his passion for family, beauty in nature, creature comforts and people-watching). Rather, it is for him greeting each day with an active sense of curiosity and letting that shape his days. And that marks the third group of people--letting the journey reinvent itself each day. In our culture, we don't often hold up this approach as a viable option, yet it is where many of us find ourselves, especially at retirement.
   

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Curiosity
Shortly after that conversation, I saw a video of Elizabeth Gilbert, author of Eat, Pray, Love, entitled "The Flight of the Hummingbird: The Curiosity-Driven Life". After traveling around and talking to audiences about finding 'that one driving passion' to guide their lives, she came to realize that only some people are driven by a consuming passion. Just as important and vital to the world are those who bring curiosity to the world, which acts as a cross-pollinator for ideas.

Looking back over my life (and looking forward), curiosity is woven throughout. I’ve thought about, learned about, and done a wide array of activities. I once had a manager whom I suspect wasn’t fond of corralling  someone with my creativity or curiosity. Shaking her head, she told me that when I die my epitaph will be, “She thought about doing a lot of things”. She was right, I have thought about doing a lot of things and I have done many of them. At the time, I didn't feel great about hearing that. At this stage of my life, I love the life of curiosity I’ve led. And through my curiosity, I would also put myself in the passion-filled group. The ability to be curious is my passion.

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Shaping Your Retirement
How will you and do you approach retirement? Do you have a burning passion that shapes your days? Do you know there is something there, but aren't sure what it is yet? Or are you committed to "letting your nose lead you" each day?

What's important is that it is right for you. If you love to be curious, don't beat yourself up trying to find a hobby or passion to do consistently. If you have a passion that drives you, find ways to prioritize your time and go headlong into it. If you're not sure what your passion is or even whether you have something you will land on, maybe curiosity is a great place to discover it.

Open yourself to the idea that curiosity and passion may feed each other. How can curiosity further deepen what you do with your passions? How can you be passionate about following your curiosity? I love that both can travel with us in some manner, no matter what our age or ability.

Questions for reflection and conversation:

• What, if anything, is a passion for you?
• How are you pursuing that passion? What is keeping you from it? What are you doing to remove those obstacles?
• Is there a way you are using your passion in community? Could they benefit from it in some way?
• What are you doing to assure that you have access to new ideas and experiences?
• How are you approaching your days to allow time for curiosity?
• How do you celebrate the new things you have learned or observed each day?
• How can you contribute to your community from a place of curiosity? What new ideas can you bring them?

There's More to Life.
I'd love to hear from you. Feel free to leave a comment below. Part of my vision is to help create community around living a great retirement. In what ways would connecting with other people approaching or living retirement be helpful for you?

Ruth Tongen helps people take stock, plan and live retirement in a bigger, happier, healthier way. She helps people move past sticking points and begin living on purpose.
E-mail her: ruth@ruthtongen.com with questions or to explore how she can help you move into the next chapter.

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